dalena | 25 | counting fancies
a dancer with mosaic
working at the learning lab
4th feb 1986
clearing out her wardrobe
eric & serene
desktop tower defence
go fug yourself
oh no they didn't
pink is the new blog
the butterfly tales
Sunday, October 22, 2006
pop, goes the bubble.
Everytime I think I'm alright, that bubble just loves to burst when it's floating happily right in front of my face. Lovely.
I hadn't felt as angry as I did on Friday for a very long time, really. Angry at others, and most of all - angry at myself. Angry that I'd allowed myself to slip back into that pit of resentment when I thought I'd already risen above it all; angry that I'd let almost three months of self-constraint fall away in the heat of the moment; angry that I was such a vulnerable target the entire day; angry that others were privy to my moment of weakness and anger. To sum it all up, just really angry at everything and everyone.
I really ought to get more sleep. Everytime I don't, things happen. Bad things.
Sometimes I feel like I've locked myself into a birdcage, then deliberately threw the key out of the window. Other times, it seems like maybe I've just temporarily misplaced the key.
Or even worse, sometimes, I can see the keys from between the bars of the cage I'm living in, and I know that all I need to do is to reach my arm out far enough to grasp hold of it - yet I refuse to even try.
Anyway, this is terrible. I woke up at a whopping 930pm just last night (I am THAT sleep-deprived!), which explains why I'm still awake at this insane time, blogging out of sheer boredom.
Shall try to remain awake for dimsum breakfast later!
Labels: rainy days